Welcome Clifford!

It's official folks!  Clifford has made his debut!

Yesterday was a tough, tough day.  

I had done a round of cervidil, took a break, and then did yet another round of cervidil.  

I had made it to a 2, 80% effaced.  

I had to take a break for a few hours and then at 4am they hooked me up to pitocin.

They start pitocin low and slow and increase it every 30 mintues.  

Before long I was at the max dose.  And I stayed there.  I had been on the max for hours and hours, and hours when it came time to make the decision about what we would do next.  

Dr. M is fab.  He laid out all my options and let me decide.  

I had the nurse check me.  There are 2 parts to the cervix, an internal and an external os.  The internal is what matters.  After all that cervidil and pitocin, mine was at a 1 and 1/2.  Clifford's head was still at

a -2 station....where it had been Wednesday.  That was over 48 hard hours, with no progression.

I thought hard about taking a break from the pit, and going back on.  That sometimes works.  I fretted and cried about it.  Talked to my sisters and Zac.  I finally decided that Doc was right all along, his head wasn't engaged in my pelvis, and that's why I wasn't progressing.  I decided to take a night, try to sleep, and do the c-section in the morning. 

I hated the decision.  I still do.  Even though he is here, and he is super fantastic and I fully realize that is all that matters, I still hate it.  I hate all the side effects and the recovery time and the restrictions.  I hate how it will effect the start up of the office.  I hate that in some completely irrational way I feel like I "gave up."  And I hate that I don't feel that way about any other lady that's ever had a c-section, but that's how I feel about mine.  (I know, ridic.)  

Zac and I slept as well as we could last night.  The nurse came to prep me around 8 for surgery at 9.  

I walked back to the OR while Zac had to wait.  They set up my IV's and started a spinal block. 

I've never felt so bizarre in all my life.  I have so much more empathy for those who have a paralysis.  

They laid me back and started surgical prep.  

The nurse went and got Zac for me. 

Shortly Dr. M got the ball rolling.  

At 9:49 Clifford made his big, and I mean big, entrance.

He was whisked away before I got to see him and they cleaned him up a bit.  

Zac got to be there for it. 

I was super jealous.

Clifford weighed in at 10lbs, 14oz.  He is 22 inches long.

I got to hold him for just a few, but lying flat on the operating table made for a really awkward angle, and I soon passed him back to Zac.

By 11, I was in a recovery room with my men.  Cliff and I got to have bare chest time.  It rocked.  

I am happy to report that I feel pretty good.  Very tired, but good.  Clifford is an excellent nurser.  He put in about 35 minutes his first round, then he went to have a bath.

He's back in the room now, and being loved on by all.  

I have got to wrap this up and take a nap before his next feeding. 

Welcome to the world baby!  You are absolutely perfect!

Clifford Stuart Ballard

9/9/12 at 9:49am

10lbs, 14oz

22 inches 

We love you Little Big Head