Random Facts, Vol. 11

 

My husband has an odd habit. 

I suppose, honestly, it is my fault he has it. 

 

It all started when he was still working in St. Louis.  He was gone half the week, home half of the week.  He was half living out of a suitcase (or in his case, duffel bag) for about 2 years. 

 

One thing that drove me crazy was that he would pack extra clothes, then mix the clean and the dirty stuff together in his bag, so I never knew what needed washed, and the clean clothes weren't exactly downy fresh. I would complain about washing "clean" clothes again because he couldn't figure out an appropriate spacial arrangement in his luggage.  

 

This continued up in until the day he then started making me what he called dirty clothes "packets."

Yep.

Packets.

 

What in the world is he talking about you ask? 

This.....

 

 

This is a picture from our hotel from last weekend. 

As you can see, Zac has made 3 lovely dirty clothes "packets" for me.  Didn't put them back in his bag, but left them on the table...I digress.

 

Basically Zac decided that he would wrap all of his dirty things up inside of his t-shirt for the day.  Socks, wrapped up in boxers, balled up in a t-shirt.  Boom!  Packet.  

His clean clothes were kept from smelling like dirty socks and a habit was born...

 

Now when he travels, he comes home with his clothes just like this for me. 

I am a lucky girl.

 

God bless my husband, and his well contained filth.

Random Facts, Volume 10

As I was re-arranging a while house full of dressers, I realized one thing is absolutely true.  

Clifford has a ridiculous number of socks.  

He needs no socks.  

Apparently, he gets it from his mama. 

Random facts, Volume 9

Here's a super random one for all of ya, I hate toilet paper roll holders.  You read correctly.  

My aversion stems directly from my distinct hatred for changing empty toilet paper rolls.  Perhaps it is because people seem perplexed as to what to do when the roll is empty; unable to understand how to change it.  Really it's a complete waste of time and effort.  it is for this reason, when you visit my house, you will not see my toilet paper strapped to my wall.  

I keep mine as such.  

See, easy.  Except for when Zac uses every bit of toilet paper and then things are still equally as annoying as if the empty roll were hanging there, taunting me.  I keep trying to tell him to keep an extra couple rolls under the sink in his bathroom.  When he sees the last roll getting small, replace it.  I've lectured him.  He can't care.
It is for this reason he scared me awake, yelling my name across the house in the middle of the night a week ago, when his complete denial of lactose-intolerance lead to a gut-battle with Casey's pizza and poor Zac was stranded until I flung a roll down the hall at him.  I was less than thrilled about the situation.  So was Zac. 

There ya go folks.  Another very random fact about yours truly.  Lucky you. 

Random Facts Volume 8

I think I have mentioned this before, but maybe not.  You all know that I am a bit of an organization freak.  Can't seem to help myself.  I know that I wrote before that I have strange quirks, one of them being that I hate metal hangers and refuse to use anything but white plastic ones.  I make Zac have white plastic too.  Baby Clifford has only white plastic.  This is how things WILL BE at my house.  

I think I mentioned in that post, that I like to keep my closet pretty meticulously organized.  Case in point, a rainbow order closet.  White at the beginning, black very last.  

I am also such a freak about it that I arrange each color section also by sleeve length.  Tanks, then short sleeves, then 3/4 length, then full sleeve.  Can you say OCD?  I know.  I really do, but let me tell ya, it's how a closet should be run.  Now you just let me know when you realize it too.  :)

Random Facts, Volume 7

I am that guy.  The guy at the hotel that takes all of the little sample things.  I don't know why I love them, but I do!  

I'm not so bad that I steal them off of the maid's cart.  I just take the ones I figure I am entitled to because I did pay for the room.  But really, do I need them....No.  Do I want them, Yes!  

And this my friends, is why I came home with more shampoo than I left with. 

No regrets here.  None what-so-ever. 

I don't know if you know this but....

And that folks, is what I like to call, the truth. 

:)

Random facts, Volume 6

I am the family driver.  Doesn't matter where Zac and I are going, how far or how near, you can bet I'm chauffeur.  Zac says he shouldn't have to drive because he drives all day long for work.  I sort of feel like the time between 8 and 5 is a black hole and I shouldn't have to credit my husband with work driving.....but the control freak in me hates the way he is on the gas, off the gas, on the gas, so it's easier just to be the driver.  Sometimes this is detrimental as Zac is happy to sit and play games on his cellphone the entire ride and all I want is someone to praddle on endlessly with.  It is a conundrum, but it is how it goes every time we leave the house.

On Tuesday night I was expecting a call.  Zac had demanded that I drive him to fill up our water bottles (another quirk for another random fact volume) and then drive us to Dairy Queen.  Any pregnant girl in her right mind doesn't turn down a DQ treat.  Really, ANYONE in their right mind wouldn't say no.  Especially considering how delicious it is and how much I love ice cream.   

So away we go and immediately, I get the call I am expecting, which turns into a conference call.  Luckily the car was stopped and Zac was filling bottles, so I wasn't as distracted.  This is about the time I realize, I just walked out of the house.  No purse, no I.D., no driver's license, but more importantly, no cash to buy treats.  I wrote Zac a little note.  He read my note, then signaled that he needed a pen.  This is what I got back from him. 

That definitely says HOME AND SHIT!  With shit underlined for emphasis.  He is a man of few words, but gets his point across.  It cracked me up!  I did take him home, he did run inside and I did take him to DQ and I did mute my phone so I wouldn't have to explain that I was as concerned about my ice cream situation as I was about the call.  What can I say? I am an efficient multitasker.   

Now I just have two questions...where can I drive ya?  And will you be buying me a twist cone? 

Random Facts, Volume 5

I have a drinking problem.  Before you Intervention me, booze is not my downfall.  I simply haven't the traumatic history or addictive personality to pull off regularly drinking alcohol.  Plus I cannot fathom how after a bender, anyone can get right up and do it again.  Not this girl.  I drink 4 beers in an evening and I have a bellyache plus headache the whole next day and wonder what was I thinking when I drank 4 beers?!

(Another random fact, it is my preference after watching the Life Aquatic to call benders "over-night drunks."  In a sentence, "Now I'm going on an over-night drunk and tomorrow I will find the shark that killed my friend.  You are welcome to go with me."  See, now you like it too.)

I do enjoy a beverage.  I fully believe a person should be trying to drink 1/2 of their body weight in ounces each day.  I think I regularly hit that mark.  In fact, I think I exceed it.  Mom always has a drink beside her.  Always has.  It's become my habit too.  Where ever I am, I have a cup by my side.  I take a drink to work everyday.  It's one of the first things I make myself when I get home.  And there is a cup perpetually on my bedside table.  Ice water is my preference.  Lots of ice.  A close second is tea, which I need to really cut back on because of baby.  I feel a little guilty for the caffeine, but the decaf tea, in the words of my dad, "sucks the hind tits."

Why do I mention it now you ask?  Because.....it's starting to become a hindrance.  Baby is starting to put some pressure on my bladder (I know, I know, it's gonna get worse) and it is driving me crazy.  When I am busy at the office it is especially annoying.  The worse is that I feel like I can pretty much pee every 30 minutes.  Sometimes almost immediately after I just left the bathroom.  It was so bad a couple Sundays ago that I thought about using the tiny children's potty in the nursery (it's a little toilet, like the ones they have at Kohl's in the family bathrooms)....but I wasn't so sure that if I were squatting that low I wouldn't just end up peeing on the back of my jeans like a girl that's unsure how to pee in the woods.  And wet pants are not for me my friends. It would be a disgrace, I know how to pop a squat.
There are no bathrooms on my Dad's farms, you gotta know how to pee outside without ruining your britches for the day.

Anyway...this is my battle.  Drink enough to stay hydrated and meet my daily quota without making me need a trip to the bathroom between every 3rd patient.  Soon I may give up and look into adult diapers just for the sheer sake of convenience.  Don't pretend like you haven't thought about it.  Ya liar.       We are all just a few years away from an SNL style "Oops I Crapped My Pant's" skit.  Well, that may be a stretch, but you get my point.   

Staged support

Of all the shows on tv for my man to really love, it is American Idol that he is into.  I tolerate it.  He would say I like it.  I mostly sit and read and complain about the song choices and how they "gag me." He sits and laughs and we pick who we think is going home.  It's a thing we do now. 

 Last week we were watching the eliminations and it looked terrible.  I commented to Zac about how much it would suck being a contestant.  Especially when the other contestants are singing all up in your face and you have to smile and clap along...uhhh.  Awful.

So fast forward to elimination night and I say to Zac, "Wouldn't it suck to be a contestant right now. How awkward."  To which he replied "Oh man, I've thought about this. Having to sit on stage, never knowing when the camera is on ya, giving cheesy grins and having to be "supportive."  I laughed hard.  Mostly I think because of the fact that he was really into his response and he sat up off the couch and then he finger quoted supportive.... and because it is so true.  Just look how awkward this picture is and it's not even a tense situation.  I am uncomfortable for them. I am glad Zac and I are on the same page.

Maybe it's just me and my aversion to what I have dubbed "sharing and caring hour."  I get the same feeling when I am in awkward group situations, ie my first day of school when they video taped all of us introducing ourselves and stating why we decided to pursue becoming chiropractors.  I didn't care about why everyone else was there.  I would have rather had the day off.  The vast majority of my classmates agreed.  I felt dorky.  Feeling dorky is not my thing.  

  Just know readers, if we are ever in the middle of a team building exercise, I will like you better if we can just make fun of the really enthusiastic people together.  If you aren't equally as disinterested and sarcastic as me, we probably won't work well together anyway.  I wonder as I write that, if maybe that's a character flaw I should try to correct, ...but it is true and I can't care.  

Random Facts, Volume 4

 This is a weird one folks...but I have hanger issues.  That's how far my OCD/anal retentiveness extends.  I refuse wire hangers.  They are awful.  I also refuse hangers that aren't white.  It is ridiculous.  I know.  

It's not just my closet...Zac's hasn't escaped my watchful eye.  His closet may be messy and it may drive me crazy that it is not organized by rainbow color order, but I definitely made sure we were clear on the hanger issue.  

Today I had to make a Wal-Mart trip.  What do you imagine is the first thing I personally bought for baby? White hangers of course! (I suppose it's not true that it's the first thing I bought baby, I bought baby a book...but that happened before I even got pregnant.)  The hangers are so small and dainty.  How is it that even hangers can be cute?

So there ya go.  Another bizarre facto about yours truly and it is random as can be.  Just know if you are coming to my baby shower, I do not want pink or blue hangers.  I refuse them.  Go white or go home!  But seriously....I only want white ones. :) 

Truth in advertising

I find myself to be a little too trusting of others.  Why you ask? 

 Because every so often, they remind you that some people have nothing to hide.    

There is absolutely nothing special about this stove. 

I appreciate truth in advertising. 

So...

a tornado slept in my bed last night.  (It also opened my bedside table drawer....and left it open with lotion bottles all hangin out and stuff.) 

With such restful sleep is it any wonder that I have a stiff neck and sore hip.  Yep, turns out I am old enough for that.  Watch out Maggie...your mid-20's are the new 60+.

Random Facts, Volume 3

I love to multitask!

Actually, I'm just a little ADD.  I start a project, then jump to another for 10 minutes, then back and forth and forth and back.  I do get stuff done, don't get me wrong.  I like to call it multitasking.  Zac thinks I just can't sit still.  Hard to say who is right.  Well, actually, Zac is never right. :)

This is a picture snapshot of what my last Wednesday off looked like.  First, I changed the sheets and started the laundry.

While the laundry was rolling, I prepped dinner and then washed up all the dishes.

Since dinner was prepped, I started trying to get stuff done for our Ethel Edith show.  First, I painted..

Since paint takes some time to dry I would stop mid-painting and sew...

Since sewing takes forever, I'd take breaks, paint more, then sew while it dried, and switch the laundry around.  Then I got a little inspired by my christmas glitter and silver and decided it was time to paint one of my side tables.  Outside he went....

Coat him once, come inside, paint more, sew a row more.

I am a whirling dervish.  This is me everytime I have a day off.  I swear, I just have a never ending list of stuff to get done.  Here's to hoping I stop trying to do it all in one day, all at once! 

Random Facts, Volume 2

I decided that I should share with you lovely blog readers a little bit more about Zac and I.  I told you a little bit in this post here....  but we both have little habits, and they are not pleasant.   I have issues with closing drawers and doors.  It's true.  Case in point, my bedside table.  

It's messy.  I know.  Don't judge. I drive Zac crazy with this, only because he has no spacial awareness of his head, and will run it into a half open cabinet door.

My dresser.  Yup.  That's all me.  Can't blame Zac. 

Now, lest you think Zac is normal, he can't stand when bars of soap get too used.  

Exhibits A, B, and C.  No, your eyes don't deceive you.  That is 3 bars of the same soap in 3 different stages of use.  

Now don't you feel like you know our idiosyncrasies a little better?   You can read about a few more of them here.  And to look at us, you'd never know :)

Pet peeves

mis pronunctication
curtains just at the corner of the window
flat pillows instead of propped pillows
things not being stacked in size order
left lane interstate drivers
slow walkers at walmart
"real" doctor

Random Facts, Volume 1

I have a secret.  Well, if you've been reading my blog for any amount of time it may not be so secret, but...I can't spell.  I mean, I can, but only the big tough words (thank you doctorate).  When it comes to the little stuff I've got nothin.  I think it is a mental block for certain words.  I just can't get them right.  Apparently this comes from my Dad, or at least that is what Mom says on her little blog.  Here are just a few on my list as I would like to write them: perferable, suprise, recieved, akward, emmensly,  onrey, maintainance, and sadly enough,  I occasionally type ov instead of of.  It's absurd, and embarrassing, but true.  I just hope you don't prefer to be immensely surprised cause it won't happen from me.  

Now get out there everyone, and have a fab day full of proper grammer and correctly spelled words!

Free time

I got to take 1/2 a day off today.  Wisely, I chose my day off this month based on when I had this 1/2 to maximize my off-time.  The way I figure it, this gave me a whole lotta time to do what I want.  Then I got to thinking about what I actually do with my off-time.  A majority of the time, I'm by myself, and it's entirely up to me to entertain myself.  I always do something a little girly just to satisfy the part of me that's concerned with being pretty.   I also try to do something nice for Zac to satisfy the part of me that wants to be a good wife.  Usually this is something small, like making him cupcakes or his favorite dinner.  I occassionally will do something crafty, like sewing or painting.  So last Saturday, on my day off,  I found myself alone, with my hair deep conditoned and my nails newly painted.  I had organized my closet, changed the sheets, and done laundry.  I also mowed the yard for Zacman.  I accomplished a lot and it was only about 2.  With my compulsitory stuff outta the way I did what I really like to do in my spare time.  Prepare yourselves, it's ridiculous.  In my spare time, when I've got nothing else I feel has to be done, I turn into a total guy.  Here's an example of what I mean. 

My tonight, Friday night, alone.....I had my half day at work and got home around 1, changed clothes,  ate lunch, and watched a little t.v.  I then cleaned my whole house, like hands and knees scrubbed the floor.  It was hardcore cleaning.  Not so oddly, I like a little music while I clean, maybe a little more oddly, I prefer rap.  So me and Snoop Dogg cleaned floors, dusted, etc.  After I got done cleaning I ran to Wal-mart.  While I was there I picked up some Easter candy for Zacman and (here's where the guy transitions stars) a six-pack of beer.  Yep.  I proceed out of Wal-mart, but was distracted by the Red Box and had to stop to pick up an action flick (and I already had one picked out at home).  I got home, heated up left over pizza, poured myself a beer, and am now over half an hour into Clear and Present Danger.  Now who out there would tell me that sounds like a bad time?  That's right, no one.  I am amused, I have to admit.  I'm not sure that if we did a survey, many people would guess that a good time for a 26 year-old married gal is rap and action movies.  But it totally is for me.  Like I said, it's ridiculous, but makes me happy.  I also got to wondering, if this is what I do with my free time what's everyone out there doin?    

I feel as happy as this guy about Blue Moon and deep dish pizza! 

P.S. For those of you that may be concerned about my pizza and action flicks, have no fear cause I am totally looking forward to trying the new body wash, eye shadow and mascara I picked up at Wal-mart tonight so I'm still a girly-girl.  

Like a rose

I wish I knew how I smelled.  Writing that makes it look silly and makes me feel like a dweeb, but it's still true.  Ya know, everyone has their own smell.  My friend Angie I could pick out of a line up.  Same with her cousin Brock.  I could find my mom, I could find Zac (especially if his shoes are off hahaha), I could find Baby Ollie and my Aunt Jamie.  I know how they smell.  None of them smell bad, aside from Zac's feet but I forgive him for that because the rest of him smells nice.  They just have their smells. 

 I think I have kind of a weak smell.  I walk into a Subway and I smell like I've rolled in onions.  I even look at a campfire and I'm Smokey the freakin Bear.  Let's put it this way, if my smell were in a wrestling match, it would be tapping out shortly after the whistle.  I try to change it.  I lotion.  I body spray.  But I think even my artificial smell is subtle.  I could be wrong though.  I could have a cartoon-like cloud of stink like Pepe Le Pew.  That's the thing about smell, you're not to sensitive to your own. 

I know I probably smell like my house and everyone's house is distinct.  That scares me a little bit.  I'm afraid I'm a terrible combination of candles, taco meat, and nail polish.  Annie stopped by the other day with Ollie.  First thing she said was "No offence, but it smells like garbage in here."  I was oblivious.  I mean, it is what happens when you put the hamburger wrappers in the trash right after you just put in a new garbage bag.  Don't ya hate when that happens?  You just took out the garbage and now you know you are gonna have to do it the next day too.  I digress.  Like I said, I'm a little paranoid about it.  I just wanna know.  Am I like a vanilla and dove soap smell?  Am I citrus and verbena?  Am I coconut and rum? (Coconut and rum hahaha I've cracked myself up!)  You get the point. 

I have a dream...

Well, lots of dreams really.  I am a nightly dreamer.  Lately my dreams have been downright crazy.  Crazy!    Annie told me Aubrie lost her teeth the same night I have a fairly drawn out anxiety dream about losing my teeth.  I had multiple bizarro dreams last night.  Started with a class trip to a lake where I was canoeing around, then realized that my "team" had just won and there was an awards ceremony that I had to run away from to avoid a killer in a beat-up truck.  In the dream he stabbed me behind the knee when I was trying to escape in a car.  Behind the knee.  Awful.  That's about when I woke up.  Then fell back asleep to have a deep sea diving dream in which I spear fished to catch a giant (like dolphin sized) sturgeon.  The most bizarre part is that I was swimming with these giant fish in an underground cave and thought it was AWESOME.  Fish creep me out, big time.  I had a hard time snorkeling on a vacation because I could see how close they were to me.  I could never be comfortable with that, but I was loving it!  Anyway, my mom says dreams are only entertaining to the people that have them (this is mostly after I tell her about an odd dream) but it has been so crazy lately they are still popping into my head today and it makes me uncomfortable.  I thought maybe if I put them out there for the whole world to see, maybe I might have a normal, boring dream tonight about dinner and a movie with Zac.  Here's to hopin...and dreamin.  

Netflix and subtitles

I just want everyone out there to know, I LOVE NETFLIX.  Trust me, if I were a product/service as well, I would marry it.  I was sent home early from work on Monday and told not to come in yesterday due to the "storm of the century" central IL was supposed to get (which has been more of an ice storm and considerably less snow than I expected).  I did not fear for I knew there was a variety of T.V. and thousands of movies waiting for me.  I never wish I had cable instead.

When I wrote my blog about my quirks I realize I forgot to add a multitude of things, but the one I'd like to mention today.  I LOVE SUBTITLES!  I know, it's weird.  Who seriously watches movies with subtitles on when they have no hearing issues? Me!  I actually prefer to watch with the volume slightly low and the subtitles on.  

I just can't help myself subtitles are so great!  It is the only problem I have with netflix...no subtitles :(  Oh what to do, what to do?  I guess I just need to take a break from reading my movies.