Drumroll please....

I left out a few things from our family Christmas.  This video in particular is fab!

Yep, that's my husband. Yes, I told him I wanted to see "how much you dig it" in reference to his painting.   I just told him that we are having a baby and he is gonna be a dad and yep, he did tell me "Congratulations." Hahaha I love him so bad!  

(ps...neither of us can believe our voices in this video.  is my voice really that deep and zac's really that nasally?  i say probably.)

That's how I decided to tell my manny.   I knew for a few days but didn't wanna just blurt it out when he walked through the door.  All the online ideas were too....I don't know....just not right for me.  I am simply not gonna make a whole baby themed dinner and have to repeatedly ask Zac to pass the baby carrots.  He wouldn't get it anyway.  He would've just told me that he doesn't even really like carrots.  I know him.  Anyway, I figured we needed a family portrait sooner or later and this was the perfect excuse.  This is our little painting.  

And just to make sure there was no confusion, he got a little note on the back!

Of course the day I told him we had all of 10 minutes before we had to leave and head out to a joint birthday party for Maggie and Aubrie.  We did our best to snap a few pictures of the moment and went to eat ice cream and cake, which is reason enough to celebrate :)  

At this point, I already knew I would just wrap up my painting and have mom open it at Christmas.  I figured, I will tell my family, Zac can tell his.  I should've handled Zac's....

As I mentioned, we always go to Zac's parent's house for Christmas.  We went up on the 23rd.   I waited the whole night, he says nothing.  NOTHING about baby.  I just wanted to tell someone...darn Zac.  The next day was of course Christmas Eve.  I worked in the kitchen with Zac's ma Lolla and he hung with his dad Jim.  I kept waiting.  Lolla told me Emily was playing baby Jesus.  I snuck out of the kitchen, told Zac he has his in, go tell your ma that our baby can be Jesus next year.  He replied "I don't want our baby to play Jesus."  What?!  He gave no further explanation....I was frustrated.  Zac drug his feet the entire morning.  Finally his dad says they are going to his parents house and I told Zac he absolutely had to tell his parents because he WOULD be telling his Grandma Betty when he was there.  She WAS NOT going to find out through the grapevine.  He said ok, he would tell them.  Lolla bought  him some time by suggesting lunch before they left for Dick and Betty's.  We ended up at Hardee's.  We ordered our food and the nice lady brought it out to us.  We were about half way through our meals when Zac throws it out there.  He said "So, Abbie and I have news.  We're gonna have a kid."  

Nice.  Not, "were having a baby" not "you're gonna be grandparents again".  It was "we're having a kid" as if I'm birthing a toddler.  I'm surprised he didn't follow it up with a "Can I have one of your fries?"  He is the master of nonchalant.  

His parents were thrilled, this will be grand baby #17 for them.  Crazy right?!  17.  When we got back to the house I had to ask Zac "At Hardee's...really?  That's the best you could come up with?"  He laughed.  I asked him if I should take care of telling the rest of his family.  He agreed I should go ahead and handle that.  

My parents announcement went a little smoother.  I wrapped up the painting again.  Of course Mom opened the wrong side first and was confused.  She looked at me funny, I rolled my eyes and told her to turn it over.  She cried..

Then she showed everyone sitting in the living room

Then she realized Dad wasn't next to her, and yelled for him.  He smiled...

then kissed my mama.

Then ma told Aub and Ev who didn't quite care...

Then she expressed herself with her hands :)

Mom was thrilled of course.  I think first she said she had "oh I am so happy!  I had given up hope."  I think I replied, "what the hell I'm only 26?!"  Then she explained "No, I mean given it up on an announcement for Christmas."  (She assures me, she knew I would have babies, she just didn't know when.)  Apparently Grandma Toots called it.  She and mom both debated about us having news to share this Christmas.  Grandma was right.  

Zac and I just got home from our first appointment.  We got to watch baby's heart beat.  I am due August 30th....I thought Aug. 26th so I was pretty darn close.  It was exciting.  I told Zac that I had no problems identifying baby's head from it's "rump."  He agreed, stating "I know how embryos have giant heads."  I laughed and told him baby takes after it's Dad already.  To which Zac replied, "Let's hope not. Otherwise baby is walking around lookin like a grapefruit on a straw til it's like 20."  Hahahaha!  He kills me.  Not his fault it took awhile to grow into his head :)

So there ya go world.  My announcement is official.  I've got a bean-on-board.  Here's to eating ice cream without apology and having a legit reason for ignoring some of my housework!

High Point, Low Point

Zac has some great ideas.  Saturday he came home with one.  He said that when we have kids old enough to participate, he wants to do high point/low point of the day with them at the dinner table each night.  This, of course, immediately led to high point/low point of our day.  

I went first....on Saturday, the high point of my day was a day hanging out with Maggie and the babies.  Caroline and Penelope can brighten up any day.  The low point of my day happened right after I got home.  Dad called me, he had a job.  One of my neighbors had called him and put him on high alert.   As you may have guessed by the name of my blog, I live in a trailer, in a trailer park.  Mom and Dad had a renter they evicted this fall.  Apparently when he moved out, not only did he leave a mess all around the trailer, but he left the doors unlocked.  Some of the trailer park kids found this to be pretty fortuitous playground.  They had been in and out all week.  When I got there, the lights were on as was the stove...set to 500.  The neighbor lady pointed them out.....I wrangled kids and promptly walked them back to their respective homes and chewed ass.  If you won't watch your kids, don't be surprised when I lay down the law.  And in that same right...I guess that I shouldn't be surprised that, with the exception of 1 parent, they really didn't care that their kids were at risk of falling throught a rotten trailer floor as it was burning down....or that they could be abducted at any point, by any random person driving through the park.  But I said my piece.  Darn trailer park. 

Zac told me his high point and it cracked me up.  Ya'll know he is ridiculous by this point.  Zac told me this was his high point was being being able to stop on his drive and take a pee in the middle of the road.  Yep, peein in the road.  It went a little something like this...

"Ya know one thing I love about working in super small towns?  I was driving to a job today and I super had to pee cause I drank a bunch of coffee and I just stopped and peed in the road.  That never would've happened in St. Louis. In St. Louis you are never alone for a second!.  Here no one is around.  I could've taken a dump this morning if I wanted to."  My response.."Please don't do that."

Hahaha he kills me!  Seriously, who says that!  

His low point I'm afraid was not nearly as amusing.  I guess some guy completely blew a stop sign and Zac had to swerve to miss him...that was how his day started.  Luckily with a lot of coffee and a little  road everything improved.  Thank God for wide open spaces!

Now I am curious, what was the high point of your day?

Fox Family Christmas

Every year at my family's Christmas we rock a theme.  We've had funny hat Christmas, the ugly sweater Christmas, and last year was all about being Vestive.  This year, elf hats!  Thank you Oriental Trading.  And additional thank you's to mom for buying me jingle bells and to Zac for begrudgingly helping me sew said bells on to the elf hats.

I snapped a few pictures before we destroyed the pile of presents.  

Zac and Dad....and for some reason I think they look a little alike in this picture...glasses and beards I guess...

Mom and Dad

I called the sisters as soon as Zac and I got to Mom's because we were an hour early.  I was just sure they would yell "Be right there!" Turns out, they were more like "Ok, see ya in an hour." 

Eventually the Daniels and Reids made it to the party.

Mag and Kylie

and the ever-smiley Penelope.

Zac showin off his super uncle skills before we got down to the real festivities.  

As I mentioned, we like a themed Christmas.  Mom and Dad got special elf hats, they were green AND red and had far more bells.  They rocked em. 

We all did really....

Even Ollie O found some festive antlers.

  Here she shows her disgust with uncle Zac insisting on wearing his Cubs hat over his elf hat.  Sub par uncle Zac. Sub Par.

Luckily Zac's hat fiasco didn't slow down Ev

Or Mom and the Beans

I painted the 3 of us girls for Mom a few years back.  I decided it was time for her to have her grandkids too.  Peneolope looks ridiculous.  It's the eyebrows.

Dad, lucky man that he is, got a bunch of new man toys for his soon to be butcher shop.  He was pumped. 

Beans was too.

Even in the middle of all the excitement we like to take a minute to pose for the camera.

Annie vogue-ing

We do too much P90X yoga....

There were a few more great pictures to come, but this post is already picture crazy so I will wait. This is really what Christmas is like with my family. Presents piled to the ceiling, wrapping paper EVERYWHERE and a good time had by all.  

A very Ballard Christmas

Every Christmas Zac and I make the rounds.  When I was growing up Christmas Eve was always reserved for Grandma Toots and Grandpa Howard's.  They aren't able to handle it anymore, primarily because Grandpa has a hard time with crowds and lets be honest, Christmas for 45 people is overwhelming.  Especially when you are 87 and 92 respectively and trying to buy presents for every single person there.  It is crazy.  When I started dating Zac I found out his family had a big meal on the 24th.  Everyone comes.  I was sad to give up Grandma's but did.  Then made Zac give up his family's for a year or 2 until Grandma and Grandpa decided it was their last year and back to the Ballard clan's we went. 

This is Lolla's (Zac's mom) tree.  This is the reason, every year, that Zac goes on and on about how fake trees suck.  I myself prefer a glittery tree.  Doesn't matter if it's white, gold, or silver, let it shine!  But Lolla's tree is beautiful.  It can't be denied.  Just don't tell her it was me if she comes home to a spray glittered evergreen.  

I think I have mentioned before that Zac has a big family.  If I haven't, I have been remiss.  He is the baby of 6 kiddos.  He is also the biggest, even though the camera angel steals some of his height here.  This is almost the whole family.  Brendan's kids didn't get to make the trip from Texas, otherwise there would be 4 other crazy yahoos.  I will give ya the run down.....

Back row is Brendan (brother) and his wife Katie, Logan, Ange (sister), Gary, Chris (brother), Zac and I, Jim (dad), Sara (sister), Casey and Joe.

Middle row is Lexus, Sam, Sue (sister) and Emily, Max, Cheyenne, Esme, Angie and Alexander, and Lilly.

Up front is Owen, Nolan and Kaylee.

This is how the families go...Brendan is married to Katie, he has Meredith, Caleb, Ben and Josh from his first marriage.  Ange is married to Gary and has Lexus and Logan from her first marriage.  Sara is married to Joe and has Sam, Lilly and Max.  Chris is married to Angie and they have Cheyenne, Owen, Esme and Alexander.  Sue is married to Casey, they each brought 1 to the party, Kaylee and Nolan and have baby Emily together.  Whew...confused yet?  I frequently call them the wrong names.  Sorry guys.  Now back to Christmas....

On Christmas Eve Lolla's church always does the Christmas story.  The little kids act and sing.  It's sweet.  This year baby Emily was the star of the show.  She put forth a very solid baby Jesus performance.  

Just look at those little lambs and angels!  They were cracking me up.  My favorite part is that they kids each prepare a gift for Jesus, based on what talents they feel he has given them.  Most sing or play piano.  Apparently the kid playing Joseph didn't feel musically gifted because he dribbled a basketball.  Jesus gave him mad b-ball skills.  There was one other boy that was killing me.  The kids that did sing generally kept with the holiday theme.  A little Rudolf the Red-Nosed Reindeer, Jingle Bells, etc... then my favorite little wise man got up and busted out the national anthem.  Ha-larious!  But I kept a mostly straight face, except for that I was grinning big time.  He got me good!  

After that we always go back and get to chowing down, then presents and chit-chat and kids wrestling. Then there is the loading of the cars and bundling of the kids before everyone sets off home.  Zac and I always stay the night then drive down to my parent's house the next morning.  Here are a few of the family pics from our time and Jim and Lolla's

Zac and Jim

Katie and Nolan

Esme

Lolla and baby Emily (exhausted from her lead role)

Sara and Sam

Casey and Kaylee

Brendan and Katie

Lexus and Owen

I got lucky when I married Zac.  I did inherit a big family that is hard to keep track of, but they are great.  The like each other and that is so nice! I am just blessed to not be the girl that dreads her in-laws.  I remember when I first met them his sister Sara said to me "Thank God you are normal!"  to which I replied, "yep, very normal."  And while normal is maybe not the right word for us, we are definitely happy and look forward to time together and that is what counts! 

Next up....Elf hat Christmas with my family!

Puppy love and other paintings

I just realized how long it had been since I'd written a blog post.  I've got a ton to write about, I really do.  I've just been overwhelmed with all the real life things I should be accomplishing....like the presentation I have at the hospital in 2 weeks that I haven't started on....but I digress.  

I thought I would start my return to blogland with holiday stuff before it seems ridiculously late.  So first off, Christmas presents, then when I get my SD card working, actual Christmas photos.  My friend Darby had big plans for me.  She knew exactly what she wanted.  Her mom and her step-mom are pet lovers and happen to both have amazingly cute pups.  Darby sneaky snapped some photos for me and away we went.  The top painting is of Tina's boxers.

The bottom is of Sherry's two yorkies and a sweet old hound.

I loved these.  Both of them.  I hear they were a hit around the Christmas tree too, which I was thrilled about!

The next three are done for an old friend named Debbye.  She has a running tradition with her 3 girls.  Each year they get a special present that says "believe."  This year, she asked me to do 3 paintings of the bell from Polar Express and work believe into them.  Ask and ye shall receive!

I tried to make each one unique and let the girls pick which one they dig the most.  

My Christmas paintings have sent me a rush of more work.  I think I have 2 for a lady named Ann, 1 for Annie, 1 for Maggie, 1 for my cousin Ali, and 2 for a coworker of my friend Darby.  I just gotta get on it!  I have been sick however and spent a fair amount of time trying to scrape myself off the couch.  It's not been going well as of now.   Here's to hoping I'm back on my game by Wednesday, I've got work to do!

Hair today, gone tomorrow

I did it again, I went a little crazy.  Like making random drastic changes to my appearance crazy.  I told my mom and sisters for a long time that I was growing out my hair to donate it.  I've done it before and was about to donate it a second time when Mag and I ruined that opportunity.  She was fresh outta cosmetology school and her friend had told her about a new way to roll a perm that created big loose waves.  She asked if she could try it, I said sure.  

Mistake #1:  Trying a new way to roll, when you don't know how to unroll it to check the set.

Mistake #2:  Listening to your sister, the chiropractor, when she says "Well, how long can a perm stay on?...let's just leave it the full 20 then." 

Mistake #3:  Freaking out when you have ramen-noodle hair and then immediately shampooing.

Mistake #4:  Leaving the salon with said ramen hair.  

Luckily mom's friend from high school was one of Mag's instructors from cosmo school so she was happy to look at it to see how it could be fixed.  Unfortunately, there was nothing to be done.  I believe her words were, "Oh Abbie....Oh...I don't know.  It's pretty bad."  Or something to that effect.  I chopped it all of.  When in doubt, scrap it and start over.  

Since then, I've been a little more protective of my hair.  I kept growing and growing.  I really had intentions of cutting it sooner, but kept it just like a kid clingin' to a baby blanket.  I wrote my dear friend Lauren a letter.  I told her I was debating the hair cut (damn you pinterest) and told her by the time she got the letter I would have decided whether or not to man up.  

But then again, that was precisely the problem.  I did not want to look like a man.  

Zac was not so encouraging.  When I asked him if he would love me just as much with short hair he answered, "well, I guess I kinda have to."  Not exactly the support you are looking for, but I figured he could suck it up.  (it has grown on him....he said so, without me even asking)

So in to the salon I went.  I decided that there was nothing wrong with looking just like my mom and sisters and that I would not look man-ish.  Mag asked how short she could cut it.  She really wanted to take it up to my shoulders.  I said no way, if it's getting cut, we were cutting to donate.  It took us 45 minutes to come up with the courage to whack it off.  The other girls in the salon wouldn't leave for lunch until it was cut.  It was quite the event. 

This is where I started. 

We sectioned it, Maggie cut off the ponytails, then I looked this good. 

That was attached to my head.  Weird right.  And somehow, after it is removed from my head, I find it creepy and gross.  It was even creepier when it rode around in the console of my car for weeks until I actually mailed it to the donation center. Ewww.

This is my new do. 

Mom says it makes my eyes look pretty.  I would argue that they have always been pretty.  I look just like my mom and sisters now.  

Case in point.

Now I rock the short do.  I like to give a little faux hawk too.  My patients dig it.  Even the older ladies with their perma-perms.  They think it is really cute.  I love them for that.  I think they need faux hawks.  So that's my hair today, gone tomorrow story.  Hopefully you feel inspired.  Hopefully you will grow and donate to people in need!  Hopefully you look good with short hair....... :)

Being bold

This post has been a long time comin'.  For those of you who don't know, I love my church.  My family and I attend New Hope.  If you are ever in our neck of the woods, I highly suggest you check it out.  Back in May, Pastor Van (PV as he calls himself) did a series called the Eleventh Hour and I continually think about those 3 sermons.  So much so in fact, that I requested copies of all 3 and have given them to my friends.  The point of the series was of course, to discuss the end times, or the events leading up to the return of Christ.  It really helped me to gain perspective.  The end times have already begun.  We really do have a limited amount of time with which to share our faith, to develop our relationship with God, and to find salvation through Jesus.  Now, if you are not a Christian, these things may seem like ridiculous notions to you.  

I am a Christian.  I have been for years.  I have also been a very poor example and have not exactly been a winner of people to the cause.  Religion is a very personal experience and it is very easy to show up, to say the buzz words, to judge others because of an elevated idea of Christian morality without ever fully understand what it's like to truly LOVE GOD and to live a life FOR HIM.  There is no big blinking sign over our heads that say "this girl is the real deal."  It is easy to fake.  I am not any better which is why I wanted to write this.  I lie, I disobey, I blatantly ignore, I judge, I refuse to forgive, I skip church to sleep in.  For a long time, I pretended to be what I was not and I was comfortable in doing so.  I am a work in progress.  I frequently fail.  But I am a Christian.  This is what all Christians are, whether or not we want to believe it.  We fall short.  We disappoint.  We are hypocritical.  

We are ALL in the same boat, it's just that some of us have life preservers.

Pastor Van, at the end of the Eleventh Hour series did a sermon about being bold.  He didn't mean spiky hair and over-done make-up.  He didn't mean asking out the person you have a thing for or singing karaoke.  He specifically talked about being bold in your faith.  That means putting it out there for others to judge, to make fun of, to scrutinize, but more importantly, putting it out there to be a beacon to others that might otherwise NOT know or care.  People that may have NEVER been interested, that are, just because it is coming from YOU.  I took this to heart.  That night I went home and wrote a few emails to my friends.  This is what I sent to a boy I attended chiropractic school with....

I've been thinking a lot about you lately, mostly as you had posted on facebook about re-reading the God Delusion. We never sat down at school, or anywhere really, and had a discussion about religion. I am a Christian and, while I may not be most the well read or the most highly informed, I have considerable faith and try my best to support my faith with reason. I know that sounds a little like an oxymoron as most people would assume that no thinking person could believe in creation with so much scientific proof of evolution, but I do. Sometimes in life I find there are things I just KNOW. And then it becomes a matter of finding proof...like the fact that fossils can form in tens of years instead of hundreds of thousands and the fact that carbon-dating is fallible. 

With that being said, I offer whatever info or debate I can to you. I know you are probably not interested, as you've stated that you don't like to discuss religion, and that's ok, but you and your faith have been on my mind and I wanted to at least offer. I believe the world would be a different place if Christians took the time to talk about they whys of what we believe and discuss without judgement. After all, I can't expect anyone to live by my standards if they don't have the same belief system I do. So, I'm not sure what you believe, but there are far too many people out there, calling themselves Christians, but living for/in pursuit of the wrong things. If you have even an "seed" of faith (matthew17:20), I'd like to help you to find the room to grow in it. That's my offer. 

ps..keep in mind that I'm a student of faith and there are people out there far more qualified to answer your serious questions with a perfect explanation. I'm just going to try to do my best.

He never responded.  In fact, he simply stopped responding to every message I sent him.  I don't care that I might have ruined a friendship.  I didn't quit.  It's just that now, instead of sending him a message when I think about him, I say a prayer that God might give him ears to hear.  That's my new effort.  

In trying to share what I believe, I have noticed a big shift in me.  It's not really how I act necessarily, because I have always been are pretty "good" person (...I know, I know, "not by acts") but in how I pray mostly.  Instead of asking God to change, I ask for him to show me HIS will.  I make an effort to turn over my problems and let HIM sort them out.  I have been given in return some of the most clear and undeniable directions I've ever received, and that my friends, does nothing by strengthen my faith and cement my beliefs. 

So I challenge all of you, in the spirit of the holiday season, to be bold in your faith.  To share it with others.  It is intimidating and can be uncomfortable, but comfort is not WHY you are doing it.  Just keep that in mind.  We grow the most as individuals, as Christians, when we are UNCOMFORTABLE.  You may be rejected, you may lose a friend, but you may also change someones heart and you will definitely change yours.  

P.S.  If I have offended you, I don't care.  If you have questions or are exploring religion, I extend to you the same offer I did to my friends.  I am no expert, but I have "ears to hear" and will do my best to help in whatever way I can.