Random Facts, Vol. 11

 

My husband has an odd habit. 

I suppose, honestly, it is my fault he has it. 

 

It all started when he was still working in St. Louis.  He was gone half the week, home half of the week.  He was half living out of a suitcase (or in his case, duffel bag) for about 2 years. 

 

One thing that drove me crazy was that he would pack extra clothes, then mix the clean and the dirty stuff together in his bag, so I never knew what needed washed, and the clean clothes weren't exactly downy fresh. I would complain about washing "clean" clothes again because he couldn't figure out an appropriate spacial arrangement in his luggage.  

 

This continued up in until the day he then started making me what he called dirty clothes "packets."

Yep.

Packets.

 

What in the world is he talking about you ask? 

This.....

 

 

This is a picture from our hotel from last weekend. 

As you can see, Zac has made 3 lovely dirty clothes "packets" for me.  Didn't put them back in his bag, but left them on the table...I digress.

 

Basically Zac decided that he would wrap all of his dirty things up inside of his t-shirt for the day.  Socks, wrapped up in boxers, balled up in a t-shirt.  Boom!  Packet.  

His clean clothes were kept from smelling like dirty socks and a habit was born...

 

Now when he travels, he comes home with his clothes just like this for me. 

I am a lucky girl.

 

God bless my husband, and his well contained filth.

When Mommy is away...

the men will play.

 

Last night I had my first real marketing event. 

Cliff spend the night with his dad.  They were flyin solo.

Mom met me to pick up Little Bitty around 1, and I didn't get home until about 9.

It was a long time to not see my little manny.

 

At about 6, I sent Zac a message to see how Clifford was holding up.

Making sure he was not a disaster.

I was expecting a text back like, "good, ate 3 ounces" or "peed through his outfit, sleeping now."

 

Instead, I got this picture....

 

with the message....

 

"he's shitfaced"

 

Hahahaha! Cracked me up.

I literally laughed out loud.

It is totally a drunk face!

How many times have you seen that same expression on a college student's facebook page?

 

Suffice it to say, that response was unexpected.

By now you'd think that I would have a handle on my husband's special brand of ridiuclousness.

 

 

 

Poor Cliffy.

  Let us all hope that in the future that you are a bit more photogenic.

 

 

Big men

This is baby Clifford the day he turned 1 month old. 

He is wearing a 3 to 6 months outfit. 

Something tells me Cliff may end up big too big for this world. 

He gets it honest. 

I love my family.

There is just something about seeing your husband cuddling your baby that makes you love him even more.  It also makes you cry at random.  

I am so thankful for my two favorite men.

I will also be thankful when my hormones level off and I'm not a bawling mess.

30th brthday

Tuesday, the 9th, was Zac's 30th birthday.  Neither of us can even believe it.  How in the world is Zac 30?! 

Which begs the question, when did my husband get old? 

Does that mean I'm getting old? 

Is 30 really the new 20?

Let us all hope so.

Time is really flying by.

This is Zac's 6th birthday that he's had me to buy him gifts. 

This year, not so surprizingly, he wanted electronics.

More specifically, he wanted money to build a computer to act as our media server now and in the future. 

"Media" may be Zac's first love.

Well, second now that Cliff is here, but it is his biggest passion for sure.

Zac's 30th birthday also fell on the same day as Cliffy turning 1 whole month old.

As I mentioned, time is flying!

We decided to get a picture of the two of them together. 

It went poorly.

Thank goodness we are not quitters.

Cliff might be though....

Thank goodness he has his daddy to soothe him.

 

Well, kind of.



As I mentioned...Zac needed a little celebrating. 

Of course, Cliff is here, so he needs a card from us both. 

Plus, a card gave me opportunity for my sneeky plan.

 First, I had to find a card.

Then, I waited til Itty Bitty fell asleep, painted his hand, and signed his daddy's card.
Next...the sneeky business.

Cliff seemed to have his umbilical cord forever.
For. Ev. Er.
Seriously, like 3 and a half weeks.
The entire time it grossed Zac out.  He would yell at me when I cleaned around it, constantly insisting that I was hurting him, when he was clearly fine.
We were both thrilled when his cord finally fell of.
It happened to fall off in the middle of the night and I had to fish it out of his sleeper.
I just sat it on the changing table. 



And, that's where it continued to sit. 

See, gross.  

Neither of us wanted to touch it again.  We were at a stalemate.

Who was gonna cave first and throw it away....then I hatched a plot. 

And Cliff officially had a "present" to give his daddy. 

Hahahaha, gross. 

And that was pretty much Zac's reaction too. 

"Is that Cliff's cord. Ew. I'm gonna throw it away."

Sorry cord.  You were icky.
Happy birthday honey!
Cracked me up.

That evening we went out for a super classy dinner at Buffalo Wild Wings.
It is not a real celebration if you don't have to use the extra straw on the table to clean your teeth.
Yep. Thanks husband for that move.  Sexy.

On the way there Zac realized it was cheap wings night.  He was thrilled, then a bit disappointed.
He said he hoped he could eat all that he planned to, since lunch had left him uncomfortably full.
He said "Seriously, I didn't stop being uncomfortable until about the time we left the house." (which was about 6:30)  And followed up with, "I went out to lunch for my birthday today.  It was half price taco day.  I ate 4 mini-burritos, 2 tacos, and a quesadilla."  Then I snort laughed.
He is ridiculous.  And apparently has a hollow leg.

Thank goodness for my ridiculous husband.
My ridiculous, 30 year old husband.
Happy birthday Zac.
You are loved.

A good deal

My husband loves a deal.  Can't pass one up.  

At Best Buy he has a pretty sweet discount.  He also has something called "accomodation" programs where manufacturers offer BB employees additional discounts or rebates on top of his regular discount.  

He is generally thrilled with his discount, as am I.  

It used to be that Zac would come home with a blue bag stuffed full and then we would have to have a talk about priorities.  Now, fortunately, he calls before he drops money on random things we don't really need.  Well, most of the time. 

Two days ago he called to ask if I needed any Sharpies.  He said that they were on "mega super discount."  I told him sure, I could use a couple at the office.  To which Zac replied, "Good, cause I already bought them."  He said they were on close out, and he bought a ton.  

These are the markers he bought.

This is his receipt.  

That's 39 Sharpies for $10.  

Mega. Super. Discount. 

I told him I would take a pack of the colored markers to the office, and probably a pack of black too.  

He told me that was fine, just so long as I saved a pack of black ones for my dad.  

I have a husband that thinks of my dad, and does little things for him, just cause he love him.  

Now that's the really good deal.  

Thursday "off"

After the drywall was finished in the office, I was all over the next few steps in the process.  Like I readily admit...I am impatient and would work from dusk til dawn to get the office done.  Luckily I have people more reasonable that I that reel me in a bit.  Plus my cliffbelly slows me down and, as much as I hate to admit it, makes me occasionally stop and rest.  Unfortunately, resting makes me anxious and leaves me with plenty of time to form an agenda for the next day.  

Thursday was no exception.  

Thursday is Zac's day off.  This means, Thursday is Zac's day to work for someone other than Best Buy, namely Dad, or me.  Last Thursday, he was all mine.  Mom also made the mistake of volunteering, not realizing that she would be worked until she lost interest in helping and her back hurt.  

I can promise you work friends, I can't promise you will not regret the offer to help...

Zac and I showed up first and I was fully agend-ized.  We had a plan.  

Zac would work on putting up the base shoe under the trim while I painted the desk area, so that the wall caps would be done and I could paint them while he installed countertops for the front desk.  

After painting, was cleaning, mopping floors and hopefully steam cleaning.  

This is Zac, fulfilling the plan and base shoe-ing like a pro.  

While he did that, this nook was my domain.  I have no pictures of the process...but we all know what painting looks like.  

In keeping with the plan, Zac and I switched areas, and mom and I painted the trim like pros.

(That's professional painters mind you, not pro like prostitute...though I imagine some prostitutes are skilled painters...and it makes me curious as to how much difference their would be in the hourly rates of the two professions, as well as the difference in dress code for painting....anyway....)  

After painting Mom and I moved around the absurd amount of tools that are hanging around the office. As you can imagine, we mostly just moved them from one pile, into another, and cleaned around them.

By the time the trim had 3 coats of paint, the front desk had two, we had rearranged the tools, and mopped the entire office twice, Zac had the countertops all set.  

He had also installed the top boards that cap the front desk...and caught me trying to take sneaky pictures of him at work.

I can't help it...I think he is cute. 

With our leftover paint, which seemed to never end, we trimmed underneath the wall caps.  We figured that would help to speed up the wall painting process at least minimally.  

By the end of the day, my front desk area, was looking like a front desk.

The office was starting to take on a whole new look.

And Mom had assumed the position. 

Fortunately, when you work for me until your back hurts, I can do something about it.

After Thursday's accomplishments I was on top of the world.  Then I realized, we had a TON of painting to do.  I talked to Mom and quickly realized I needed a crew.  Maggie had offered to help on Saturday, so I knew she was in.  I put up post on Facebook and managed to guilt or bribe help out of my cousin Ellen and my Aunt Jackie as well.  When it comes to that combination of ladies, I knew work would get done...and there was a very real possibility that someone was going to pee their pants laughing.  The best part is that it was not necessarily going to be my weak bladder that gave out first.

Stay tuned for Saturday's escapades.   

Flair for writing

Sometimes I should know better than to ask Zac to fulfill tasks that are clearly my domain.  Things like folding blankets and sheets, organizing a closet, or writing cards.  I know I should handle it.  He has proven such things to me.  I have blogged about Zac's card writing skills before here.  

On Sunday, Annie and Maggie threw a joint birthday party for the kiddos.  

Everett was 5 on the 16th, Caroline is 3 today, and Penelope will be 1 on the 23rd. 

Sunday morning Zac and I worked on my office.  I had birthday cards for the kids there that I kept forgetting to bring home.  We were a little late leaving the office, so on the ride to the party I asked Zac to fil out the cards.  He asked me what to write.  I told him.  He wrote and then told me how bad his handwriting is....how it looks like a child's handwriting and that I needed to be the one to write the names on the envelopes.  I laughed at him and told him he needed to fill out the other card too and I would fill out the envelopes.  

This was the lovely message he wrote for me as I dictated to him.  

He promptly picked up the next card and said "Alright, next card.  One year old, what's it gonna say?"

I just looked at him and waited.  I watched as the realization struck....the one year card was clearly for Penelope...and he just wrote her message in the other card.  I think he may have thrown out a curse word or two.  I told him he was not to be trusted and said "looks like the kids won't be getting cards..."  He assured me that this was exactly the reason why he should not be the one filling them out.  

I couldn't let it go that easy.  I told him, "Zac, really?  Clearly the kitty card was for Caroline. (She is obsessed with animals, especially kitties)  She would have loved it.  And obviously the 1 year card was for Peneolpe.  Their birthdays are ruined."  

He told me it was my fault because I told him what to write.  I just laughed at him.  He is ridiculous.  I assured him that he would not in charge of the cards ever again.  Except for cards for me....and I still expect those to be straight from his heart...and I won't even mind if it's written in all capitals, in a card that is completely out of context for the situation.    

Smelly man

It is safe to say that the Zacman is a die-hard Cubs fan.  Our 3 years in St. Louis did very little to change that.  He is not the tickets to every game fan...we don't have the time or money for that I'm afraid, but he is a "every hat I own is a Cubs hat" pride-showin' kind of fan.  

He will only wear a certain brand.  He claims no other brand fits, which is believable considering the size of Zac's dome.  I figure he should have an XL head if he wears XL shirts and size 13 shoes.  I thank God for his big-ness.  If Zac were an average sized man, I'd look ridiculous.  Especially now that I'm pregnant...but back to the story....

Zac always asks for a few things for his birthdays and Christmas.  He always wants white t-shirts, Puma socks, blurays, and a Cubs hat.  For Christmas (I think, maybe) Maggie made him one happy man when she bought him this camo Cubs hat

He loved it.  He wore it constantly.  

One other thing you should know about Zac, he sweats enough for 2 men.  The vast majority pouring off his oversized head.  He insists on wearing a hat everytime he works with my family, then proceeds to sweat through his shirt and hat at a minimum.  I logic-ed with him that heat escapes from your head, therefore, a hat makes him hotter.  He said it caught the sweat. Gross.  

I have finally convinced him to start wearing shorts...and very recently (like the last 2 days), to use a hankie tied around his head, instead of the camo hat.  I even bought him a camo hankie to increase the chances.  Why do I care so much, you ask?  Because my husband was the stinky man.  

That hat smelled terrrible!  I washed it countless times, soaked it in Tide Sport, even washed it with the whites to get a little bleach action goin.  Failures.  All of them.  

I would frequently think "somethings smells awful" then look up to see Zac, wearing the damn hat.  I threatened to throw it away....he threated to be a giant ass about it if I did.  So I let him smell.  You get to make that decision for yourself when you are 29, and I was tired of fighting him.  

About a week ago I was sitting at Mom's house when she got a call from Dad.  She got off the phone and said "your Dad says you need to wash Zac's clothes in Tide Sport cause when he gets hot he smells sour."  I knew the hat was back.  I found him in Maggie's salon, 20 minutes later, basking in the stink and sweatier than any other man there.  I told eveyone about our hat battle in an attempt to shame Zac into burning the hat.  Didn't work.  

Instead, Zac came home with a new plan via Maggie.  Baking soda and vinegar soak. 

Zac filled his hat up with baking soda, poured in white rice vinegar (because he was too lazy to look for the regular vinegar that was with the cleaning supplies).  That should have been enough, but he decided to go big or risk certain doom for his poor hat.  He added a full scoop of the powdered laundry soap I made, and a whole cap full of Tide Sport.  It looked really nasty....

Ya know what I think really helped, the fact that he just left the hat, in this state, for 3 or 4 days until the next time I opened the washing machine to start a load of laundry.  In the words of Ron Burgundy, it was a "formidable scent."  

I was, however, really pleasantly surprized to find that his hat came out of the wash a normal smelling hat.  The color was a little lighter than when it went, but the smell was...I don't want to go so far as to say nice....let's go with neutral.  Here's to hoping it doesn't go back to terrible the first time he decides to get really good and hot while wearing his Cubbies hat.  I simply can't abide a stinky-headed husband....especially with a stinky little man on the way.

Golf Pro

Zacman has a few loves in life.  Electronics, blu-rays, food, sleeping in, and golf, are high on his list.  Zac has been on a budget for a long time, and I won't lie, it is fairly strict.  He has been talking lately about getting golf clubs.  I told him, he could buy them when he saved the money. 

 He looked at me like I had crushed his dreams.  It was seriously pathetic.  

Luckily, Zac is a man with some talents....and some fairly unused tools.  He sold a couple tools, removed and sold an amplifier and stereo system from his car and before ya know it, he had scraped together the money for some new irons.  He called a few times the day they were supposed to be here.  He was thrilled to get them!  

Look at him grinning in these pictures.

He was seriously pumped!

I did let him charge his golf bag.  He does have a job scheduled that will pay for it and he can be very convincing.  Plus, like he said, it just didn't seem right to get new clubs and have no where to put them. He is spoiled.

As soon as he had them unwrapped, he was out the door....with the water jug.  

Because if he is off work early, he can run errands too.  And, because tea (not made with "awful tap water") probably should've been #1 on the list of things Zac loves.  

Happy golfing Zacman!