Monday, August 27, 2012

Painting Fools

Last Saturday was a long, busy day.
 It was painting day at the office.  
I rallied the troops to help me, which meant I had Mom, Maggie, Aunt Jackie and my cousin Ellen on loan from their families for an afternoon.  I showed up a little early to clean and organize and start trimming the ridiculous number of corners.  Maggie had appointments in the morning, but was done by 10:30.  I requested everyone be at Mom's around 11.
The crew picked up lunch and made it to the office just in time to yell at me for being on the step ladder trimming above the front door.  Mom was not having it!  I got a lecture about the dangers of heights and working with my arms above my head.
She is a boss cow.
  I am a defiant cow.    

After lunch I put everyone to work.  With 5 of us, and a whole lotta wall space to cover, I figured 2 people to roll and 3 to trim.  

Maggie volunteered to do the high stuff and be the guy that had to constantly move the ladder around.  This is mostly because she was the only one tall enough to reach the ceiling other than me and there was no way anyone was letting me on the ladder.  Again, the dangers of ladders....  

I took the high rolling, Aunt Jackie took the low.  Mom and Ellen scooted around on the floor painting around the black trim first and then hit all the corners and around the doors.  Notice how every room is slightly open to the others.  This means the entire space is one color.
You all know me.  One color is not my thing. But, its what we had to do.

All in all, the day went really well.  We chit chatted and yammered the whole time.
Aunt Jackie and Mom repeatedly stopped conversation to parrot back what they thought we'd said.  Turns out they are both going deaf and lots of words sound the same, even if they are clearly out of context for the situation.

We started off with 5 gallons of paint.  My whole office is 1200 square feet, and I thought we'd get pretty far with that.  I was wrong.  It all ended up taking 9.  Nine freaking gallons of paint.  After the first 5 were just about empty I left to get 2 more gallons.  I had to leave...because it turns out I don't know my own strength.  I had asked mom to bring me an extender stick.  She brought me a twist on handle to her broom.  I broke the stick right below the threaded part.  I moved on to just painting lower stuff by hand.  I broke the roller handle clean off.  After destroying my entire painting set up the ladies all suggested I take a break.

I was off to Menards.  After "investing" $10 in quality extender sticks and roller frames I made my way back to the office.  I requested that the 2 new gallons of paint be mixed into what was left in the 5 gallon bucket, that way, in case the shade was not 100% perfect, there would be less of a difference.
Aunt Jackie repeatedly said "two gallons is not enough."  To which we would reply that we weren't trying to fill the bucket, we were just mixing the tones.  This exchange happened 3 times I think before I said, "holy shit" in response to the "not enough comment."  Ellen snort laughed and Aunt Jackie finally explained that she meant not enough paint to finish painting the entire office, not fill the bucket.  We finally got through to her that we were not painting the 4 enclosed rooms that day.
Communication is not always our strong suit.

This was the office at the end of the day.  

For some reason the walls look terrible in the picture....and super, super dark.  I swear that's not what it really looks like.  In fact, it kind of begs the question, "why is she posting such terrible, inaccurate pictures?"  Truth is, I don't know why...but I am going to post this anyway.

The next day Zac and I went and finished the painting.  He neglected to warn me that he is a terrible trimmer....and overall not the best painter in the world.  He is, however, diligent and both of us worked forever to get the office done.  We still had a big project ahead of us...the dreaded floors!

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