It's official folks! Clifford has made his debut!
Yesterday was a tough, tough day.
I had done a round of cervidil, took a break, and then did yet another round of cervidil.
I had made it to a 2, 80% effaced.
I had to take a break for a few hours and then at 4am they hooked me up to pitocin.
They start pitocin low and slow and increase it every 30 mintues.
Before long I was at the max dose. And I stayed there. I had been on the max for hours and hours, and hours when it came time to make the decision about what we would do next.
Dr. M is fab. He laid out all my options and let me decide.
I had the nurse check me. There are 2 parts to the cervix, an internal and an external os. The internal is what matters. After all that cervidil and pitocin, mine was at a 1 and 1/2. Clifford's head was still at
a -2 station....where it had been Wednesday. That was over 48 hard hours, with no progression.
I thought hard about taking a break from the pit, and going back on. That sometimes works. I fretted and cried about it. Talked to my sisters and Zac. I finally decided that Doc was right all along, his head wasn't engaged in my pelvis, and that's why I wasn't progressing. I decided to take a night, try to sleep, and do the c-section in the morning.
I hated the decision. I still do. Even though he is here, and he is super fantastic and I fully realize that is all that matters, I still hate it. I hate all the side effects and the recovery time and the restrictions. I hate how it will effect the start up of the office. I hate that in some completely irrational way I feel like I "gave up." And I hate that I don't feel that way about any other lady that's ever had a c-section, but that's how I feel about mine. (I know, ridic.)
Zac and I slept as well as we could last night. The nurse came to prep me around 8 for surgery at 9.
I walked back to the OR while Zac had to wait. They set up my IV's and started a spinal block.
I've never felt so bizarre in all my life. I have so much more empathy for those who have a paralysis.
They laid me back and started surgical prep.
The nurse went and got Zac for me.
Shortly Dr. M got the ball rolling.
At 9:49 Clifford made his big, and I mean big, entrance.
He was whisked away before I got to see him and they cleaned him up a bit.
Zac got to be there for it.
I was super jealous.
Clifford weighed in at 10lbs, 14oz. He is 22 inches long.
I got to hold him for just a few, but lying flat on the operating table made for a really awkward angle, and I soon passed him back to Zac.
By 11, I was in a recovery room with my men. Cliff and I got to have bare chest time. It rocked.
I am happy to report that I feel pretty good. Very tired, but good. Clifford is an excellent nurser. He put in about 35 minutes his first round, then he went to have a bath.
He's back in the room now, and being loved on by all.
I have got to wrap this up and take a nap before his next feeding.
Welcome to the world baby! You are absolutely perfect!
Clifford Stuart Ballard
9/9/12 at 9:49am
We love you Little Big Head